Wednesday 6 August 2014

The Holidays

Success Criteria

DEEP FEATURES
Brainstorms to identify main ideas to be used in writing.
Uses most of the main ideas in the writing.
Uses paragraphs and sequences ideas.
Attempts to end writing with a simple conclusions.
SURFACE FEATURES
Spells most words correctly.
Uses capital letters, full stops, commas, apostrophes, question marks, exclamation marks.
THE REWORKER / EDITOR
Rereads writing to edit out information that does not improve the message.
Rereads writing to edit in words and phrases that improve the message.
Uses a dictionary to identify and check spelling attempts.
Checks writing for basic punctuation.

YAY!
It’s the holidays and in the holidays...

I went to Inflatable World on Wednesday. My grandma and grandpa took me and my two brothers Isaac and Aydan. When we got to Inflatable World it was very crowded. There were heaps of games like a giant slide, an obstacle course, rock climbing, Battle zone and 3 others and they were all inflated.

My parents went to Auckland and my grandma had to babysit me and my brothers Isaac, Aydan and Joseph. It was the most boringest time of my life. We got 3 movies. Grandma stayed over the whole weekend including Friday. I was so happy when my mum and dad came back.

Me and my family (my mum, my dad, Aydan, me, Isaac and Joseph) went to Wellington, it was about a 4 hour drive from our house. All we got to do in the car was wait and sleep. When we got there I was so happy! The first person I saw and knew was my auntie. My auntie can speak Samoan same as my mum. Then I saw Johaunis, my uncle, this guy called Thomas and Nathan. After dinner we had to sleep in a sleeping bag. Just before we left we went to Burger King and I saved my drink until we got home then drank it all.
It was good to be home.

On the 21 July 2014 we got 3 movies. They were Robo Cop and I forgot the name of the other 2. We got an adult movie and 2 movies for the whole family. That night we watched all the movies except for the adult movie. We watched all the family movies until 8.30 P.M. We fell asleep so fast that we got to sleep in the lounge.

Thats a day I will always remember.
Maybe?

2 comments:

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  2. Dear Caleb I really like the way you used paragraphs. I like the way you spelt most words correctly. Next time you could attempt to end with a simple conclusion. What kind of drink did you have?

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